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How to Use Sex Toys: Complete Vibrator & Dildo Guide
So you have bought a vibrator or a dildo, or you are just thinking about it, and now you are wondering — how to use sex toys the right way? To be very frank with you, most people never get proper guidance on this. There is no “sex toy class” in school, and honestly, most articles online are either too clinical or too vague to actually help. This guide fixes that. Here, in simple language, we will walk you through exactly how to use a vibrator, how to use a dildo, how much lube to use, how to clean your toy, and how to stay safe while doing all of this. Whether you are a complete beginner or someone who just wants to get more comfortable, this article has you covered from start to finish.
One quick note before we begin — this guide is for general wellness education only. It is not a replacement for medical advice. If you ever feel persistent pain, notice unusual bleeding, or have any health condition you are unsure about, please talk to a doctor. Simple as that.
What Are Sex Toys and Why People Use Them
Sex toys are simply tools designed to help you feel pleasure, alone or with a partner. That’s it. There is nothing complicated or shameful about it. A vibrator uses motion and vibration to stimulate sensitive areas like the clitoris or G-spot. A dildo is usually a smooth, shaped toy meant for insertion, without a motor (though vibrating versions exist too).
More and more people across Hyderabad, Kolkata, Mumbai, Delhi and other Indian cities are buying sex toys today, and honestly, it makes sense. Between busy work schedules, stress and simply wanting to understand your own body better, toys can help you explore what actually feels good — something that is not always easy to figure out otherwise.
At the end of the day, using a toy is a personal choice. Some people use them to relieve stress, some to spice things up with a partner, and some just to get to know their own body better. All of these reasons are valid.
Is It Legal to Use Sex Toys in India?
Let’s clear this up first, because a lot of first-time buyers worry about it. There is no law in India that bans an adult from owning or using a sex toy for personal use. Toys are sold openly by registered online stores, including ours. You do not need to show any ID proof to place an order, though most stores (including us) expect buyers to be 21 years or older.
What matters more is discretion and buying from a trustworthy seller. Once the legal side is clear, you can focus fully on learning how to use sex toys safely rather than worrying about buying them. A good store will offer plain, unmarked packaging, secure payment, and clear policies around returns and Cash on Delivery — so you can shop without worry.
Choosing the Right Toy for You
Picking your first toy (or your next one) matters more than people think — it’s really the first practical step in how to use sex toys the right way. Here is what actually to look at.
Body-Safe Materials
Not all toy materials are equal. Some are safe to use on the body for years; others can actually cause irritation or trap bacteria. Here’s a simple table to understand this:
Material | Feel | Cleaning | Our Take |
|---|---|---|---|
Medical-grade Silicone | Soft, flexible, body-warm quickly | Washes easily with soap and water | Best pick for beginners |
Stainless Steel / Glass | Firm, smooth, great for temperature play | Fully non-porous, very easy to sanities | Great if you like firmness |
ABS Plastic | Firm, often used in vibrator shells | Wipe clean easily | Common and durable |
Types of Vibrators
- Bullet vibrator – small, discreet, great for beginners and clitoral use. Browse our bullet vibrator collection.
- Rabbit vibrator – stimulates the clitoris and inside the vagina at the same time. See our rabbit vibrator range.
- G-spot vibrator – curved tip designed to reach the G-spot easily. Check our G-spot vibrators.
- Remote control vibrator – controlled by a separate remote, good for partner play. Explore remote control vibrators.
- App-controlled vibrator – controlled through a phone app, even useful for long-distance couples. See app-control vibrators.
- Nipple vibrator – for nipple and other erogenous zone stimulation. Browse nipple vibrators.
- Vibrating panties – wearable, discreet, ideal for outdoor fun or teasing. Check vibrating panties.
- Massaging/wand vibrators – strong, broad-head vibrators, often used on the whole body. See massaging vibrators.
Browse the full vibrator category to compare options, and keep reading below for the exact technique once you’ve picked one — that’s where the real ‘how to use sex toys’ part begins.
Types of Dildos
- Non-vibrating dildo – simple, no batteries, purely for penetration and shape. Browse non-vibrating dildos.
- Vibrating dildo – combines penetration with buzzing sensation. See vibrating dildos.
- Anal dildo – always has a flared base for safety. Check our anal dildo range.
- Strap-on dildo – worn using a harness for partner play. See strap-on dildos and harness options.
For a full breakdown on picking the right one for your body, read our dildo buying guide and our guide on dildos for women.
Anal Toys
If anal play interests you, always pick toys built specifically for it — meaning a flared base or a looped handle so the toy cannot slip fully inside the body. Browse anal toys, including butt plugs and anal beads. This is one part of how to use sex toys that beginners often get wrong, so pick carefully.
Getting Ready Before You Start
This part gets skipped by a lot of beginners, and honestly, it’s the part that makes the biggest difference to comfort. Preparation is just as important as technique when it comes to how to use sex toys comfortably.
- Pick a private, relaxed setting. Lock the door. Play some music if that helps you unwind. Rushing is the number one reason first experiences go badly.
- Wash your hands and your toy. Even a brand-new toy should be washed before first use — packaging dust and manufacturing residue is not something you want on your skin.
- Keep your lube within reach. You do not want to be searching for the bottle halfway through.
- Warm up first. Some gentle touch, kissing yourself (literally, on your arms or neck if solo), or a few minutes of foreplay before introducing the toy makes everything smoother — physically and mentally.
- Check the charge or battery. Nothing kills the mood like a vibrator dying mid-way. Charge it fully in advance.
How to Use a Vibrator (Step by Step)
Here is the actual step-by-step process, explained clearly — this is the vibrator half of how to use sex toys, so read it alongside the dildo section below if you own both.
Step 1: Start with Lube
Apply a good amount of water-based lubricant to the tip of the vibrator and to your skin, especially around the clitoris and vulva. Our lubricating gel range has options that work well here — and our detailed lube guide explains which type suits which toy.
Step 2: Turn It On at the Lowest Setting
Always start low. Vibration can feel very intense at first, especially directly on the clitoris. Place the vibrator gently against the outer area first — the labia or just beside the clitoral hood — rather than pressing it straight onto the most sensitive spot.
Step 3: Move Around and Explore
Once you’re comfortable with the sensation, move the toy in small circles, try light up-and-down motion, or hold it steady in one spot if that feels better.
Step 4: For Internal or G-Spot Use
If you’re using an insertable vibrator, apply extra lube and insert the tip slowly at the vaginal opening. Go in gradually rather than pushing all the way in one go. For G-spot stimulation, angle the toy slightly upward, toward the front (belly-button side) wall of the vagina, roughly two to three inches in.
Step 5: Increase Speed Gradually
As your body warms up to the sensation, you can slowly increase the vibration intensity or switch patterns. Most vibrators today have multiple modes — steady, pulsing, wave-like — so try a few to see what actually feels good for you rather than assuming higher speed means better.
Step 6: Listen to Your Body
If something feels uncomfortable or too intense, ease off, reduce the speed, or move the toy away for a few seconds. There is no “correct” way to finish —go at your own pace. For more expert-reviewed vibrator usage tips, Healthline’s guide is a solid additional read.
How to Use a Dildo (Step by Step)
Step 1: Choose Size and Apply Lube Generously
Pick a comfortable size, especially for your first time — thinner and shorter is easier to start with. Apply plenty of water-based lube on the dildo itself and around the vaginal or anal opening.
Step 2: Warm the Toy Slightly (Optional)
Some people like running the toy briefly under warm (not hot) water before use, especially with silicone or glass toys, since body-temperature toys can feel more comfortable than a cold surface.
Step 3: Get into a Comfortable Position
Common positions include lying on your back with knees bent, sitting propped up on pillows, or kneeling. Whatever lets you relax your muscles and control the depth easily is the right one for you.
Step 4: Insert Slowly
Place the tip at the entrance and push in gently, a little at a time. Take a breath, relax, and let your body adjust. Never force it — if you feel resistance or sharp discomfort, pause, add more lube, and try again slowly.
Using a Dildo for Anal Play
Anal play needs a bit more care because, unlike the vagina, the anus does not self-lubricate. This is a good example of how to use sex toys differently depending on the body part involved. Keep these points in mind:
- Always use a toy with a flared base — this is non-negotiable for anal safety, as it stops the toy from slipping all the way in. Our anal toy collection is designed with this in mind.
- Use extra lubricant — more than you think you need.
- Go slowly, and consider warming up with a finger or a smaller toy first.
- Never move a toy from anal use directly to vaginal use without thoroughly washing it first — this can cause infections.
Using a Strap-On Dildo
If you and your partner are exploring a strap-on, put on the harness first and check it fits snugly before adding the dildo. Practising a few gentle movements while dressed helps you get used to the angle and weight before things get more intimate. Communication with your partner throughout (“a little deeper?” or “is this okay?”) makes a huge difference to comfort — it’s as much a part of how to use sex toys well as the physical steps are.
Using Toys with a Partner
Bringing a toy into partnered sex can feel a little awkward to bring up, but honestly, most partners respond well when it’s framed correctly. Learning how to use sex toys together, as a couple, often works out better than either partner introducing them alone.
- Talk about it outside the bedroom first. A relaxed conversation works better than bringing it up in the moment.
- Frame it as an addition, not a replacement. Toys add to intimacy; they don’t replace connection.
- Let your partner explore it with you. Shopping together, even browsing our sex toys for women or BDSM accessories category together, can make the whole thing feel like a shared decision rather than a demand.
- Use it during foreplay, not just penetration. A vibrator on the clitoris during other activities, or a nipple vibrator, can work beautifully as an addition.
- Check in regularly. A simple “does this feel good?” keeps things comfortable for both of you.
Cleaning and Storing Your Sex Toys
This is the section people skip, and it’s actually the most important one for your health — a full guide on how to use sex toys has to include proper cleaning, not just technique
Why Cleaning Matters
Toys pick up bacteria, natural fluids, and sometimes dust between uses. If not cleaned, this can lead to infections — the same way not washing hands or utensils can. Clean your toy before the first use, and after every single use, no exceptions.
Cleaning Guide by Material
Here’s how to use sex toys safely after the fact too — meaning how to clean each material properly:
Material | How to Clean | Extra Note |
Silicone (non-electronic) | Warm water + mild soap, or boil for 3–5 minutes | Great for deep sanitising |
Silicone (with motor) | Wipe with a damp cloth or toy cleaner | Never submerge unless marked waterproof |
Glass / Steel | Warm water + soap, or boil | Very easy to fully sanitise |
ABS Plastic | Warm water + mild soap | Avoid boiling |
Jelly / Porous material | Soap and water, ideally under a condom during use | Cannot be fully sanitised; consider using reusable condoms on these |
Using Condoms on Toys
If you are sharing a toy with a partner, or switching between anal and vaginal use, covering the toy with a condom and changing it between uses is one of the simplest ways to stay safe. This is especially useful for porous materials that are harder to fully clean. Our reusable condom guide explains this in more detail. SMSNA’s safe toy sharing practices page (a medical association resource) covers the hygiene reasoning in more depth.
Drying and Storage
- Dry your toy completely with a clean towel before storing — leftover moisture invites mould.
- Store in a soft pouch or a dedicated box, away from direct sunlight and heat.
- Keep toys separate from each other, especially if made from different materials (some materials can react against each other over time).
Safety, Hygiene and When to See a Doctor
Staying healthy mostly comes down to everyday habits like keeping your hands clean and your environment safe, but you should never hesitate to see a doctor if your symptoms stick around, get worse, or just don’t feel right. If you’d like a broader medical overview alongside this guide, the NHS’s sexual health guidance is a trustworthy general resource.
Avoiding Pain and Injury
Most pain during toy use traces back to rushing — the golden rule of how to use sex toys safely is simply to slow down.
- Never rush — go slow, especially with new toys or new types of play.
- Always use enough lube. This is genuinely the number one prevention step for discomfort.
- If something hurts, stop immediately. A little stretch or pressure is normal; sharp pain is not.
Preventing Infections
- Wash toys before and after every use.
- Never move a toy from anal to vaginal use without a thorough wash in between (or a fresh condom).
- Avoid sharing toys between partners without cleaning or using a condom cover.
- Urinating after toy use, especially penetrative use, can help flush out bacteria and reduce UTI risk.
Planned Parenthood’s sex toy safety advice page covers infection prevention in more detail if you want to read further.
Allergies and Sensitivities
If you notice redness, itching or irritation after using a toy or a lubricant, stop use and wash the area gently with water. It could be the toy material (some people react to latex) or an ingredient in the lube. If irritation does not settle within a day or two, it’s worth checking with a doctor.
When to Consult a Doctor
Please speak to a healthcare professional if you experience:
- Pain that continues even after slowing down and adding lube
- Unusual bleeding
- Signs of infection such as unusual discharge, odour, burning or persistent itching
- Any concern related to pregnancy or an existing medical condition before using internal toys
This guide is meant for general education on how to use sex toys — always follow the manufacturer’s instructions for your specific product, and check with a doctor for anything medical.
Battery and Electrical Safety
Never charge a toy overnight unsupervised for the first time, and never submerge a non-waterproof toy in water. Use only the charger provided with the product.
Common Mistakes Beginners Make
Most problems people run into come down to skipping the basics of how to use sex toys correctly. Here’s what to watch out for.
Mistake | Why It’s a Problem | The Fix |
Skipping lube | Causes friction, discomfort, even small tears | Always apply generously before starting |
Going too fast | Leads to pain and a bad first impression of toys | Start slow, build up gradually |
Using the wrong lube on silicone toys | Silicone-based lube can damage silicone toys | Stick to water-based lube unless certain |
Not cleaning the toy | Raises infection risk | Wash before and after every use |
Jumping to high vibration speed immediately | Can feel overwhelming or numb sensation | Always start on the lowest setting |
Sharing toys without a condom or cleaning | Can spread infections between partners | Use a barrier or clean thoroughly between uses |
Choosing a toy that’s too big for a first-timer | Increases chance of discomfort | Start smaller, size up later if you want to |
Ignoring flared base rule for anal toys | Toy can slip inside the body — a real medical risk | Only use anal-specific toys with a flared base |
Pros and Cons: Vibrators vs Dildos
Both are common answers to how to use sex toys for the first time, and each has its own strengths.
Vibrators
- Pros: Extra stimulation through vibration; many speed and pattern options; works well for both external and internal use.
- Cons: Needs charging or batteries; can feel too intense at high settings for some.
Dildos
- Pros: No batteries needed; often feels more natural for penetration; great for controlling depth and pace manually.
- Cons: No vibration by default (unless it’s a vibrating dildo); needs manual movement.
Honestly, a lot of people end up owning both, since they serve slightly different purposes. There’s no “better” one — only what suits your body and mood on a given day.
Frequently Asked Questions About Uses Sextoys
Start with a good amount of water-based lube, turn the vibrator to its lowest setting, and place it gently on the outer area before moving closer to the clitoris. Increase speed gradually as you get comfortable.
Apply plenty of lube, pick a comfortable position, and insert the tip slowly, a little at a time. Never force it — pause and add more lube if you feel resistance.
Yes. Even if your body produces natural lubrication, added lube reduces friction significantly and makes the whole experience more comfortable, especially with toys.
Yes, if not cleaned properly or if shared without a barrier. Regular cleaning and using a condom cover when sharing significantly reduces this risk.
Many people do, especially external vibrators. If using internal toys, make sure to clean thoroughly afterward.
Conclusion
Learning how to use sex toys really comes down to a few simple things: go slow, use enough lube, listen to your body, and keep things clean. That’s the short answer to how to use sex toys the right way. Once you get comfortable with the basics covered in this guide — from picking the right vibrator or dildo to knowing exactly how to clean and store it — the rest becomes second nature.
If you’re ready to explore, browse our full range of vibrators, dildos and lubricants on our site. Every order ships with discreet packaging, Cash on Delivery is available across India, and you’re backed by our 7-day return policy. For more reading, check our complete guide to female sex toys in India or reach out any time via our contact page.
Take your time, be kind to yourself, and enjoy the process of learning what feels good for you.
